When you become fearless, the narcissist will become nastier and attack you even harder. Narcissists feed off of control and power to try and fill the void within themselves. Picture a vampire. In the movies, a vampire is otherwise a nice person. They just have to kill and drink blood to sustain their own lives. The narcissist is much the same. They feed off of chaos, power and control and they don't have any concern with who they hurt doing so.
Narcissists want you to be scared and live in fear of them. When they throw their temper tantrums, they want you to be cower so much that your mind goes into fight or flight. In flight or fight, your body releases hormones like adrenelin. It causes you to not think straight and can increase the chance of clouding your memory.
You fear them and the narcissist LOVES that. They love that they can control you with fear. They love that because you're scared, they can shape your reality by gaslighting, manipulating and abusing you. When you become FEARLESS however, you destroy their fantasy that they can shape your reality.
How to become fearless!
Here at Grey Rock Communications, we find that the narcissists amp up their attacks when we take over communications. Because we don't have the emotional trauma attachments to your narcissist ex, we send fact-based messages. Narcissists will sense that we aren't afraid of them and they will launch more and more attacks. We see this all the time! The narcissist will try to beat you down harder to prove that they are the winner. They constantly have to lie to themselves that they are God's gift to the world when really, they are a little child in an adult body.
Once the narcissist sees that you aren't afraid of them, they attack more. If those attacks don't work in subduing you into their reality, they will retreat momentarily to plan their revenge. "How dare they not be afraid of me?" They will stop at nothing to harm the fearless one. They will even harm their own children to exact their retribution on you.
Realize this, the narcissist will NEVER CHANGE. They will always be as emotionally mature as a six-year-old. They will never get better. They will never become logical. They will never be responsible for their actions. They will PRETEND to be these things to hoover you or convince their next supply to stay with them. But they don't ever change.
Because they never change, it takes a tremendous amount of strength to fight off their revenge, attacks, jabs and gaslighting. And the stronger you get, the more they will attack. For this reason, it is highly likely that the narcissist will re-trigger clients. Just when you think the water is safe, the narc jumps right back in with more and more attacks. The narc doesn't want solutions, doesn't want to co-parent, and certainly doesn't want you to become strong enough to fight them off. They are like an oversized playground bully.
How can you stop them?" you ask. The only way to completely stop them from the abusive, harrassing messages is to go completely no contact. Block them everywhere and never communicate with them again. But when you share children together, you can never get away. That's where we come in. Grey Rock Communications is the closest thing you can get to "no contact" for victims of narcissistic abuse. We take the B.S. messages they send and filter them to fact based, informational messages for you. You never have to read their crazy again.
What will you do with your newfound freedom?
We suggest that you take time, heal, reflect and grow. Being a victim of narcissistic abuse doesn't mean you have to be an eternal victim to them. Find out why you allowed them into your life in the first place. Figure out if you have a need that is not being met that you sought/projeted into the world. Find the strength to analyze yourself and grow stronger and more independent (instead of co-dependent). We will handle the narcissist for you and you can finally get out of survival mode.